So this morning I began reflecting on a thought surrounding the idea of being aware and open to WARNING SIGNS
The idea is that it would apply to any relationship, to any "continu-ationship" (something that's been continues but not necessarily steady like a relationship with a partner, family member, co-worker)
Also, just a word I made up.
The realization of these warning signs come into play when you being to realize that the continuationship is not appropriately matched. That it's off and unequally yoked. It is just not what you want therefore sticking around to see it out is not only hindering yourself but anything that continues to happen only damages things further. So it's time to cut this loose. Break it off. Break free from it.
From the jump, these warning signs come first in a conversation we have with ourselves.
"Okay Simone, what are/were the warning signs? The signs that have been there since day one. The signs you saw throughout?"
Definitely difficult to do in the moment because all you want to do is focus on the good things coming about. The things that feel good right now. The things that make the warning signs seem "meh, not so bad."
But we are only doing ourselves a disservice by continuing to behave like we don't see what is right in front of us. That in which we know is not a standard that we keep.
So these warning signs about the other person is good to have and be mindful of.
However, I believe the true essence of Warning Signs come into part with understanding ourselves. Asking...
"What are MY warning signs...?"
"What are the things that I start to do that I know are only setting me up to fail...?"
The truth definitely shows itself when we are diving into these relationships without any disciple over our behaviors and emotions.
And I'm bringing this to the table because I am not sure if I had considered this before... my own Warning Signs that (can) set me up for trouble.
To reflect out loud even further, some of my mix up and most of my discomfort with these relationships I have entertained were coming from a place of myself telling myself things weren't right.
My intimation. My spirit. All warning me, telling me like... "that's not it Sis, that is not it!"
In hindsight, I will tip hats off to my spirit and give credit because it knew very early on it was not going to be well.
Lastly, and most importantly as I continue to do work on self...
Identifying my own warning sings are not to ridicule or to put harm on myself. They are not to be mean or to be callous towards ourselves.
It's really just to learn and to be more graceful and more understanding when we find ourselves approached by these things. (warning signs)
For example; one of mine I'd say would be over committing. Like I get committed to a relationship/friendship EARLY. And I would say that's a legitimate warning sign.
Like, Sis. Why are you committing yourself over so early. What have they done to prove themselves worthy of your top tier love? You're best self? All of you?
A great and I believe, appropriate question to begin asking myself when I feel the need to go that far that early.
In conclusion (because I am writing an essay, ha), I believe this is worth continuing to have a conversation about. Uprooting and find foundation in new soul so we may grow.
What are your warning signs? How do you know when you are doing a little too much? When do you know you need to scale back and give YOURSELF what YOU need??
Right? Because I've got to stop expecting other people to give me what I need.
No ma'am. That is not it!
Because I've been doing so much of this work already in understanding who I am and my value and worth. I feel able and strong enough to walk away from them (toxic continationships) and choose to start leaning on who God says I am and less of who I need him (again, toxic continationships) to tell me I am.
It sucks because I'd like to believe that I am much smarter than that (moment in time). Yet, there I was. Having a moment.
And even better. Here I am. Having this moment.
<3
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